May 26, 2011

Ok so it’s been a while. I’ve been sort of hard at work with my recovery. Still trying to figure out what the hell I supposedly am recovering from. The shock of life being so hard, I guess.

My recently acquired helping professional thinks I have a certain disorder I am fain to speak aloud, resistant to write. He’s supposed to know what he’s talking about.  I find myself thinking back to all these books and moves, remembering how much I related to each character. I Never Promised You a Rose Garden, Donnie Darko, The Quiet Room, the Solist… what do they all have in common?

I’m having a lot of issues with the voices lately, they’re acting normal; It’s me that’s not. It’s just that their reality is being challenged and I end up thinking traitor thoughts… maybe all these months talking to my friend who thinks the voices are just parts of me and not real people are starting to take it’s toll. I don’t know what I think anymore. And I never really did. I knew I never did.


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